I have been very blessed, I must confess. I have had the pleasure of being a mother to three fabulous, beautiful and extraordinary young women. They have been amongst my best teachers. They are down to earth, kind, smart, beautiful, and above all, pretty much good, honest and grateful people. And, I love, respect, and appreciate them.
But, I often wonder what would I’ve thought of my “mothering” if I were my own daughter.
Do you, ever?
Ok, may be you are not a mother, you don’t “own” a child yet, but this question applies to you too, it is for everyone: a daughter, a son, father, or somebody to someone.
Do you ever wonder what it takes to be your daughter or your son? To be your boss, your peer, husband, or wife? Are we the best brother or sister that could possibly be, regardless? How do you like yourself as a friend, girl friend, or boy friend? Would you, love you?
Imagine how amazing it would be if everyone thought: “how can I do and be my best at this moment?”, “How can I best serve as brother, mother, son, friend, or neighbor?”, “What is the best I can do, so they can become the best version of themselves and do the same for others?.”
Treat people the way you want to be treated.” I hear this from people a lot. I love it, but it is a bit irritating that we keep on saying it loud to basically announce our value system and to teach it to others. But, does it need to be taught? Shouldn’t’t this be given? These are the basics of respect for ones self.
Or, is it what we are already doing? We are already treating people the best we can, the best we know how. How else do you explain these rocky relationships? It must be the best they can, right? So, after all we have done out of love and integrity, if the relationship is still not balanced, then we darn well know that something gotta change, right? Only, if it is not working, I repeat. Only if you are not happy, or satisfied. You must make some changes.:
Step one: take off them glasses and then look. I’m just saying.
Many books have been written about relationships, but not too many of them are about the simple ones. Like you and a clerk. It is nice to have recipes for relationships, but just as temperature has the most impact of how the food is going to turn out, so does people’s differences and it’s affect on relationship. Not any two of us are alike. It can get confusing.
So I figured, if/when I get confused about the dynamics of a relationship, then, I guess the simple rule of thumb is to just do the right thing. And, you better challenge your own values all the time, because our actions do reflect our values. It makes sense to put ourselves in other people’s shoes and walk the world. To “get them” better.
So, when people announce: “Treat people the way you want to be treated.” what they are really saying is: please et’s play “match our values” with me.
Happy mother’s day to all of you mothers, mothers to be, and mothers to others. Please mother responsibly. Have a good one!
